Lambaré: A Donkey Statue and a Lookout.

March 21, 2012

Here in Paraguay, driving is a little crazy. There is not a whole lot of logic that goes into the layout of the streets, how they run, the condition in which they are maintained, which ones are one-way, etc. Speed bumps are rarely clarified and potholes never filled. On top of everything, the roads are filled with nutso drivers in aggressive sedans, dilapidated trucks, and always swerving buses.

But the worst by far, in my humble opinion, is the complete lack of street signs. I am pretty sure that I don’t know where I am at most given times. This obviously makes getting anywhere new a gimantic (J Schell said this to me the other day during our conversation about beards) task. Giving directions is also pretty fun.

Case in point: refer to the map drawn above. F made this croquis to get B and I up to the lookout in Lambaré. It is not drawn to scale, but otherwise very accurate. And also hilarious. Notice the general lack of street names versus the detailed drawings of key landmarks for our traveling convenience (ahem, necessity). My favorite is the little blob of a donkey statue so meticulously sketched in.

I scoff-laughed initially but later realized how essential it was to ensuring our eventual arrival. We missed an overpass or two at one point, and had to turn around when we found ourselves lost in the land of oil rigs. We may have also nearly died seventy-eight times, but in the end, we finally struck upon the pedestal of the donkey, which, as depicted, was literally in the middle of a terribly awkward intersection. We discovered the lookout shortly thereafter. Whew.

To say I felt like an accomplished driver after that day is the understatement of the year. As my reward though, we had the entire lookout to ourselves. Oh yeeahh.

Winners.

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